Circumventing the Mistakes<\/strong><\/p>\nBeing nervous can block inspiration, and not getting inspiration can build nervousness.\u00a0 It’s a frustrating cycle.\u00a0 Priesthood holders get around this in various ways.\u00a0 Some pause before or early on in the blessing.\u00a0 They either wait for, or search for, inspiration.\u00a0 Others add filler material until something inspired comes.\u00a0 For example, they might use clich\u00e9 lines like, \u201cSister Jones, your Father in Heaven wants you to know that He loves you very much.\u201d\u00a0 While I try to avoid clich\u00e9 lines, I can’t begrudge a priesthood holder who needs a moment to receive inspiration and gets anxious standing in silence.\u00a0 Some priesthood holders mimic a King James English speaking style when they bless.\u00a0 I suspect it puts them in a comfort zone, where they feel a continuity with the language most commonly associated with revelation.\u00a0 They might also be drawn to its sweet, calming sound.<\/p>\n
In some cases, priesthood holders speak boldly and directly, but many fall into vague, passive voice.\u00a0 No priesthood holder wants to accidentally make promises that don’t happen, and passive voice allows them some wiggle room.\u00a0 I once heard about two blessing recipients who died a week or so after their blessings.\u00a0 The first’s relatives left the church because the blessing failed.\u00a0 The second’s reassessed meaning in the blessing and grew even more faithful.\u00a0 Either way, the thought that something might not come true can be nerve-wracking.<\/p>\n
Alternatively, I’ve met a couple of brethren who told me they always bless the recipient to be healed.\u00a0 Always.\u00a0 They explained that since the recipient’s faith is what counts, blessing them to be healed simply gives voice to that option’s availability.\u00a0 I don’t like this approach.\u00a0 One of the most spiritual blessings I have ever given was to a girl who I felt strongly impressed to explain that she wouldn’t be healed because God wants her to be tried for awhile.\u00a0 The words came very forcefully out of my mouth, and a couple of observers later remarked on how strong the Spirit was in the room.\u00a0 In short, I think a priesthood holder should always look for inspired words (but it’s still probably okay to tell sister Jones that her Father in Heaven loves her very much).<\/p>\n
Still, I’m rarely ever hit with something that I need to say.\u00a0 I almost always have to “search”.<\/p>\n
How I Give Blessings<\/strong><\/p>\nI have always tried to give as personalized a blessing as possible, especially for blessings of comfort and counsel.\u00a0 How I’ve done that has evolved over time.<\/p>\n
For a long time, my approach was to run through a variety of topics in my head until I felt strongly that I should address one.\u00a0 I never made a list.\u00a0 The topics were simply whatever seemed potentially relevant to the person.\u00a0 After I felt strongly about one, I would run through thoughts about it until I felt strongly about what I should say.\u00a0 So if the topic of healing came up, and I felt impressed to mention it, I would then think about whether I should bless the person to be healed now, shortly, in time, or\u2026, and most often I would get something and the right words would just form themselves in my mouth.\u00a0 I would then search for another topic, occasionally asking my mind if I should finish now, and when I felt that I should, I would close the blessing. \u00a0The details might sound kind of contrived, but I have given some very poignant, very on-point blessings this way.\u00a0 I of course don’t take credit for it, but I’ve suggested to a few new elders that it might be useful to them to look for inspiration this way.\u00a0 It’s helped a few.\u00a0 Now, when I give blessings, I rarely have to think so methodically.\u00a0 Recognizing the right words to say often comes much faster.<\/p>\n
A professor of mine once pointed out how Alma the Younger’s blessings to his three sons show poetic and literary devices.\u00a0 Alma must have prepared his blessings in advance.\u00a0 When I can, I prefer to prepare a blessing.\u00a0 I pray for inspiration, and then I spend time contemplating similar to what I’ve described above, but allowing myself to hone the right ideas better.\u00a0 I have had some intensely spiritual experiences doing this, and it has helped me give blessings I feel very good about.\u00a0 I’ve heard some members testify about the miraculous counsel they’ve received in blessings from priesthood holders who knew nothing about their condition.\u00a0 Those stories can be inspiring, but it almost always feels better to have prepared.<\/p>\n
When it’s appropriate, after the blessing I like to ask the person if they want to share what they “heard” in the blessing.\u00a0 I’m often surprised at how different their answer is from the words I spoke.\u00a0 Sometimes they focus on a short phrase that I don’t readily recall saying.\u00a0 If I’m with family, I’ll ask them if I can share some of my thoughts about what I heard.\u00a0 These discussions can be very spiritual.\u00a0 Either way, I always encourage the recipient to write down their thoughts from the blessing while they’re still fresh.\u00a0 I think even more inspiration comes when people reflect on what they heard.<\/p>\n
I think we can prepare new elders far better by openly discussing these mechanics.\u00a0 Of course, there are probably lots of ways to find inspiration in a blessing.\u00a0 How do you understand these mechanics?
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Do the Words Matter?<\/strong><\/p>\n